/adv/ — Monogamy and escort maxxing

>>34619592 (OP)
Why would you cheat? That's a shtty thing to do, that only ends up hurting both the other person and yourself.
I suppose it may vary from person to person, but to me, when you find the one, the person you really love and want to spend your entire life with, these thoughts of hoeing about don't matter anymore.
You like that person, and you want to do your best to secure a good future with them.
Not trying to be cheesy, but in my experience, clicking well with one person is one of life's greatest treasures. It's infinitely better than just mundane carnal pleasures.

So don't take things for granted. When you find someone you love and you feel loved back, treasure it, nurture that relationship.
Pussy for pussy's sake just feels empty after a while. A man needs more in his life.

>>34619645
>Why would you cheat?
That's not at all my intention, I meant I would like to have a girlfriend, or have some random hookups, or just any kind of sexual experience. If I was in a relationship, I would absolutely commit to her

>>34619592 (OP)
>I've heard that being a man slut can make you jaded, and make you unable to be cuddly and lovey-dovey and genuinely love someone. Is that real or is that cope?
I think it's probably fake and gay. Imagine the scenario where 90% of men have looked at porn and probably been addicted at some point, but regardless most men do have relationships just fine (when they're not gooning daily).

>>34619645
I wrote several paragraphs when I probably could've just kept it simple

TL:DR will escort maxxing make me jaded to love, or could I finally get my dick wet and still be happily married someday

>>34619592 (OP)
Nah, once you have sex and get a girl that you love you’ll be good. Obviously it’s hard for you to perceive this being in your current situation but all that shit really does go away once you get in a relationship with a good girl.

>>34619697
>>34619719
Ah sorry mate, I was tired and didn't read it right, my bad. It's not your fault, but mine.
I generally agree with >>34619841. Although I don't think that if you sleep with an escort you're automatically and necessarily doomed in your future relationships, I think it's good to avoid it in general.
It's not the end of the world either way, but it's different from doing it with someone you love, and indulging in hiring escorts too much may make you give less value to it, I think.
But that's just my opinion.

You're young, you will find someone one day. Take care of yourself and do good. Best wishes brother.

>>34619891
>>34619841
The advice is greatly appreciated, I suppose another issue with hookers is getting hooked and spending too much money

I'll make an active effort to meet someone in college first before I start blowing all my money

I hope I can find the one someday, its hard to see that future though, it really feels like I'm gonna die alone

>>34620755
everyone feels that way because we’re all atomized on our phones. once you make an effort to be more outgoing and get used to being more of an extrovert then the world will become your oyster.

get a sales job or part time job at a local restaurant or something. nothing will bring you out of your shell faster.

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>>34619719
I don't want to end up being this kind of guy

>>34620803
I suck ass at sales, but part time at a restaurant is actually what I already have planned

I even went through the handing out infinity resumes on Indeed humiliation ritual, hope I get a catch soon

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You have no idea how much your brain will fuck you over. Will you become a jaded man of the world smoking in the corner of a dingy saloon with a leather jacket on? No. You will go home after face fucking a girl that can’t speak English and you will hug your wife/kids/mom/dog just the same. We just do. Our brains just make it a non-issue.

Will you regret not doing it? Yes. Not because you missed out on anything of value but simply because your brain will always poison you with that suggestion every time you see a girl dressed like a whore and you’re now married. It’s not about whether you did it you didn’t it’s about the fact that the suggestion that you have will never go away.

I have used escorts for years. Whatever you think is on the other side I promise you is not there.i now grapple with the fact that if I fall in love I can never share this part of my life.

My advice is to not compromise with your sexuality. Don’t settle for a girl that can’t exhaust your sexual appetite.dont settle for a girl you don’t find insanely attractive. Find one and reciprocate by marrying her and loving her.

>>34619592 (OP)
>if I by an absolute miracle found the one, a woman that I honest to God loved with all my heart, would I be able to cope with having missed out for so many years
So you think that a meaningful, loving relationship with n amazing person will be spoiled by you not having had a bunch of meaningless sex with people you don't particularly like beforehand?

>>34621056
>So you think that a meaningful, loving relationship with n amazing person will be spoiled by you not having had a bunch of meaningless sex with people you don't particularly like beforehand?

It sounds retarded when you put it like that, but yeah. I've been touch starved and very lonely for a so many years. I dont mean to sound like a bitch but idk if I will mentally get over the trauma even if find a partner

>>34620972
>Yes. Not because you missed out on anything of value but simply because your brain will always poison you with that suggestion...

>It’s not about whether you did it you didn’t it’s about the fact that the suggestion that you have will never go away.

So basically it's all in my head, and I need to change my mentality on sex

>i now grapple with the fact that if I fall in love I can never share this part of my life.

That sounds like a difficult burden to bear idk if I could do that

>>34621125
dude you are 21, chill the fuck out

>>34621643
Okay maybe that was a little much, but it really does suck being lonely, maybe if I at least had a friend I wouldn't be so concerned with finding a woman

>virgin
>worrying about the affairs he plans to have
lmao

You'll feel fine about missing out if you find true love.
Where I live we have a hoe phase as a rite of passage, but I was too autistic for it. I was bummed about missing out, but then I found a girl and fell deeply in love. During the relationship I knew I could be with her forever and feel happy, because none of the guys who were fucking around would ever have love that deep.
Then she left me. Now I'm single with 5 years down the drain, a body count of 1, no manslut phase and the knowledge that I'll never love anyone that deeply ever again.
Go find a good woman, and when you do, hold onto her for dear life.

>>34621650
Not at all what I said

>>34621665
>the knowledge that I'll never love anyone that deeply ever again.

That really sucks to hear, hope you figure something out

>Go find a good woman, and when you do, hold onto her for dear life.

That's the plan, I hope and I pray

>>34621125
>It sounds retarded when you put it like that, but yeah.
How would you put it?

>>34623408
>How would you put it?
Will a loving relationship help me get over years of depression from being touch starved and lonely. And would meaningless sex ruin that future loving relationship

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>>34620914
Kek, that's my image. I'll give you my opinion.
Once you bang multiple foids you indeed lose the capacity to pair bond to a certain extent.
I'm a highly avoidant person and have commitment issues so most of my relationships i end up dumping the girl because they don't meet my high standards (usually impossible to meet so from the get go it's already set to fail).
So i just carry on banging multiple chicks, having a rotation and keeping my own feelings to the minimal.
It sucks most of the time, but banging sluts (non-paid ones) is fun and the more you get the harder it gets to become monogamous again.
I'm also an exception, since i have over 200 bodies. It is what it is.
And no I don't use prostitutes

>>34623919
>Once you bang multiple foids you indeed lose the capacity to pair bond to a certain extent
>the more you get the harder it gets to become monogamous again

That's what I'm worried about

>since i have over 200 bodies. It is what it is
>And no I don't use prostitutes

Jesus Christ

>>34623865
>Will a loving relationship help me get over years of depression from being touch starved and lonely.
Even asking that question is sunk cost fallacy. You can't go back in time and retroactively change how you felt. The only thing you have any control over is what happens now. Focus on that.
>And would meaningless sex ruin that future loving relationship
Actually, no. But it will waste a lot of time that you could be spending looking for something better, and there's a chance that someone you might have been really happy with will get engaged to someone else while you're busy banging hookers.

>>34624599
So more or less the same as the other answers I've been getting, it's my mentality that needs to change

>But it will waste a lot of time that you could be spending looking for something better

It's hard to believe that "something better" is going to come one day

>>34619592 (OP)
Prostitition is illegal
Sex work isnt work.
its sex.
lawbreakers will be punished severly.
prosecution for prostution guarntees execution

>>34619592 (OP)
>I've heard that being a man slut can make you jaded, and make you unable to be cuddly and lovey-dovey and genuinely love someone. Is that real or is that cope?
It’s real. It’s not as bad as with women because it really takes a lot of women to reach that point, but you will get burned out dealing with their goofiness especially if you’re just looking to bust nuts.
Remember most of what you hear about men and women and dating in this board isn’t from people who have actually lived it, it’s terminally-online manosphere brownoids who are as virgin as you are. I live in real life and meet real people, and I have never met a single manwhore in my life that reformed his ways.
>>34619711
Brother, most men are sleepwalking through their whole lives, let alone their relationships. They’re shells fried out by dopamine and serotonin and are with bitches they’re not even attracted to just because they want to have a girlfriend.

>>34621205
>So basically it's all in my head, and I need to change my mentality on sex
It’s not
>>34620972
This man has never been married, this is one of those Andrew Tate subhumans I was talking about who would be a virgin if not for working girls.

>>34625304
>Prostitition is illegal

Yeah getting in trouble is another reason why I'm hesitant

>Sex work isnt work

Oldest profession actually

>prosecution for prostution guarntees execution

Idk about all that

>>34625342
>Brother, most men are sleepwalking through their whole lives, let alone their relationships

Amen to that, it's a shame

>They’re shells fried out by dopamine and serotonin

That includes me, mostly due to porn. I've failed to quit so many times, any unique advice for quitting? I know that wasn't a part of my original post

>>34619592 (OP)
>I've heard that being a man slut can make you jaded, and make you unable to be cuddly and lovey-dovey and genuinely love someone.
not true, I started going to escorts when i was early 20s and I had my first long term serious relationship at mid 20s and I loved her intensely.
I went to escorts many times after we broke up and still loved the next one intensely.
People are just too lazy to do the mental work of dividing those part of their lives, if you take one like a physical release and the other like something more profound you'll never have this problem

>>34625661
>People are just too lazy to do the mental work of dividing those part of their lives, if you take one like a physical release and the other like something more profound you'll never have this problem
Compartmentalization is not healthy and should only be done where necessary. What you’re talking about is exactly what OP should avoid, love is a feeling not a decision.
Now granted that is the case, very few men throughout history and across the world get to experience true love, since most relationships are ones of convenience, but teaching yourself to compartmentalize intimacy like this is guaranteeing your chances go to 0

>>34619592 (OP)
>If I woke up one day and was a chad, I'd go have a hoe phase
Chads have sex way earlier than 21, no hoe phase for you pal. What is your goal? Just trying to have a sex life while searching for a wife? Or do you want to go through a series of girlfriends until onr feels right?
>>34625878
Anon, historically speaking certain men got to be with many women and it typically never stopped them from having a loving monogamous relationship. Caesar married cleopatra after going through dozens of patrician women, in fact this helps you attract women.

>>34619592 (OP)
Man slut here. Playing the field doesn't make you jaded, I love pussy. What makes you jaded is thinking each hole you find is the one that will finally make you stop and realizing she's no different than the last 5 holes you banged. I'm A ok with settling down with the woman whose for me, but on a realistic level I'm perfectly OK with just random spells of pussy getting.

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>>34626139
>What makes you jaded is thinking each hole you find is the one that will finally make you stop and realizing she's no different than the last 5 holes you banged.
I've found that treating her like she's the one gets the worst results and treating them like a piece of ass gets the best results.

>>34626145
Unfortunately yes, learned that lesson harshly with my last 2. When it was purely sex and I didn't care about the bitch, I was treated as a king, as soon as I claimed her is when bullshit started. It's like they can't help but be idiots till it's too late. My ex even said she didn't really want a relationship and was perfectly OK with me just fucking her constantly as FWB.

What I've learned is that women value freedom even more than their own pussy, they're become like manic zoo animals when they realize they can't act absolutely how they want in a relationship.

>>34626160
The problem is I have to somehow unwire everything I've ever been taught and ignore my own instincts in order to be successful. Idk if I can do it.

Just live the life. I went through a manwhore period and am now in a committed relationship. Never cheated and never will.

>>34626126
>He thinks the Ponteifex Maximus and Dictator Perpetuo gave even a single ounce of love to foids instead of Rome
Keep the Imperator’s name out ya fuckin mouth

>>34620925
>i suck ass at sales
that’s the point. most people do but those who are actually good at it are confident and genuine speakers who take risks in conversation

>>34626327
Niggers like you give italians bad name

>>34625878
not everyone is like you bro.
also compartmentalization is very common, my sister is a doctor, some days she loses a lot of patients (she works in a field where people usually go when they're very ill and dying), some of them she gets attached somewhat, can you imagine the toll that would take on her psyche if she didn't compartmentalize the attachment to her patients to normal attachment to friends or more importantly family?
I've seen her crying like she was 5 years old when my grandma died, she is for sure when one of her favorite patients die for sure but she's learned to not involve her too deep with them
Same with me and escorts, I treat them right, I fuck them like a gf, I kiss them like I love them (I said escorts, not lot lizards, sometimes I'm the only guy they fuck all week), but I don't involve my actual heart in the act.
As I said I've fallen in love many times and it felt just like when I was in high school and dying for a classmate.

>>34626389
That's a good point, idk if anyone would be willing to train me though, jobs usually just want you to already have experience

>>34626390
Like you would know, you fucking moolie